


unforgotten longing

by langmaor



Series: fefemslashweek2016 [3]
Category: Fire Emblem Series, Fire Emblem: Rekka no Ken
Genre: F/F, Pining
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-09-01
Updated: 2016-09-01
Packaged: 2018-08-10 11:18:00
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,446
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7842832
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/langmaor/pseuds/langmaor
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"Sometimes I feel like people were so caught up in her delicate image they forgot she was a living, breathing dragon."</p>
            </blockquote>





	unforgotten longing

**Author's Note:**

> welcome to day four of fefemslash week! The theme for this day is LEGEND, and I picked florina/ninian for this, since... well, idk falling in love with a dragon is pretty fuckin legendary if you ask me. I struggled a lot with this, mainly since i had no inspiration but then it suddenly hit me at 5 am. so apologies if this seems rather patched up and incoherent.
> 
> i've skipped day three, FAMILY, since I couldn't write a single word more. I've been bleeding myself dry writing upwards of ten thousand words for fe femslash week. i hope you'll forgive me... the candidates for that day were Ena/Almedha or Marcia/Astrid, just fyi.

There had been a time when Florina had despised her homeland, always hurling snowflakes upon snowflakes down their heads. She'd left Ilia behind for Sacae on a the pretense of a vacation – she'd finally left the snow behind, and yet now she'd willingly come back to it.

Oh, who was she kidding? She knew exactly why she'd come back...

_Even now, every year, the people in that area make an offering to the mountain..._

Florina bit her lip, placing the dish of strawberry flavoured shaved ice in front of the exact same spot she'd waited before in her childhood. She bowed deeply, feeling the snow on her skin, so much more used to it than her little, child self had been.

In her childhood she'd believed that the Ice Dragon would come, and would smile at her for waiting so long, and gently pat her head. She'd never expected that _leaving_ the Ice Dragon's country would bring her face-to-face with her! ...Or that returning would be so bittersweet.

She tucked a strand of stray hair behind her ear, staring up at the imposing mountain before her. Exactly as it had been in her childhood, stalwart and imposing, it stood before her. She remembered flying tantalizingly close to the top of it, for her pegasus proficiency exams, but that was all she had been able to do. Alighting on the actual mountain was forbidden, and said to bring down the Ice Dragon's wrath. If she'd cared less about the rules... would she have met Ninian sooner? Had more time to talk to her?

She shook her head. If either of them had 'cared less about the rules' then she wouldn't be here in the first place...

"Florina!"

A familiar voice called out to her, and Florina spun around to meet the figure.

"Fiora?"

Her elder sister trotted up to her, her first child bundled up for warmth in her arms. "I knew you'd be here," she said, dropping down to sit where Florina had just a few moments ago, and patting the space next to her.

Florina grinned, a little embarrassed at how easily her sister could still read her like a book. "Well..."

"You missing her?" Fiora averted her eyes, looking out onto their little village. From this height, everything felt so irrelevant. To Florina, it seemed like the higher she climbed, the stronger Ninian's presence felt. Tate squealed in her mother's arms.

"Yeah... it's silly, but every year, I think she'll be here when I come."

"Florina..."

"I know, I know! I'll move on soon enough..."

Fiora sighed. "It's been six years since the war, dear. And each year you've come here, as if chasing her."

Florina gazed at the ground in front of her. Fiora was right, and she meant well, Florina knew, but it just... wasn't that easy. She'd watched Farina have her two girls, beaming all the while, and she'd watched Fiora raise Tate, that bundle of cuteness. She loved all of them with every bit of her heart, but she felt no desire to move forward herself. She was content as she was.

"So... mind telling me about you two? I'm only listening since it's _today,"_ Fiora emphasized. Tate stuck close to her mother, grasping at snowflakes only to find them melting on her gloves. Ephemeral, just like...

"Sure! Of course I'll tell you...

"To be honest, when I first saw Ninian, I didn't think much of her. She seemed so important I... I didn't see any reason I'd ever have to speak to her. But Mark – they said, I was one of their best fighters, so I was out there everyday, almost. And of course, no one else could do what Ninian could, so she was there with me, every time.

"Eventually, I worked up the courage to talk to her. I thought to myself, well, if we're going to be together so much, we might as well be friends. I hadn't seen her speak to anyone besides her brother in the army... I thought she might be a little lonely. And the first time we talked, I found out she was an Ilian, just like you and me! That was quite the shock! I hadn't really considered her having a birthplace, silly as it sounds. She looked like she'd just fallen out of the heavens anytime I saw her.

"I started talking to her more after that. Sometimes I feel like people were so caught up in her delicate image they forgot she was a living, breathing _dragon._ I know I was, at first..."

* * *

 

_Florina stared at the scene in front of her: there was Heath, staring, just like she was. There was Hyperion, the stench of whose breath she could smell from the inch between them. And then there was Ninian herself, eyes closed, the picture of serenity. In stark contrast to the... log of wood in her arms, five jagged lines scraping the surface to reveal the paler wood underneath._

_"N-Ninian, are you... alright?"_

_"Miss Florina, I am well. Let us be on our way, yes?" Calmly she stepped aside, letting the log fall to the ground with a heavy thud._

_Florina swallowed, willed her body to move. She'd only been speaking to Ninian, telling her some more Ilian folktales, when a man's voice had yelled, panicked, 'stand clear!' and before she had known which way was up Ninian had stepped forward, no different than how she usually walked, and deflected the log with one pale hand. Its remnants lay on the floor for all to see – gashed across as if by an assassin's blade. Ninian..._

_The pegasus knight shook her head, wiping the cold sweat off her forehead with a shaking arm. She couldn't... she jogged, catching up to Ninian, trying to put her smile back on her face._

_"S-so as I was saying, in autumn..."_

_Ninian gazed back, maybe a little surprised, a slow smile spreading across her face. She listened intently, and the sounds of their talking were heard late into the night._

* * *

 

"Whaaat? You clearly just made that up," Fiora accused, causing Tate to stare. "There is _no way_ the Ninian of our army could do that! Have you seen the caution Lord Eliwood took around her? It's just too..."

"You were _there,_ Fiora... we fought the feral dragons together. You _know_ their strength... is it that hard to believe?"

"Well, yeah!" Fiora shook her head. "But you make her sound so ferocious! She couldn't lift a book by herself!"

Florina rolled her eyes. "And how much of that was caused by Lord Eliwood walking on eggshells around her? How much of our caution, our avoidance was because of her – their – _appearances?_ She was never allowed to _talk_ to us. To have friends, even. Lord Eliwood, Lord Hector... even Lyn's gazes were always on her, watching her. She was never _free_ to be herself, Fiora..."

Her sister threw her head back in resignation, her hands being occupied with Tate.

"Alright, alright. If you insist. Tell me more, though."

"Well... there's one that's a little..."

Fiora was suddenly all ears.

Laughing, Florina recalled the incident through the foggy lens of memory...

* * *

 

_Florina breathed heavily, wringing the water out of her hair. A bath she'd sorely needed, after the battle only a few moments ago. She breathed in the scent of night: calm, undisturbed, only to hear a small voice in the distance._

_"Miss Florina? Are you dressed...?"_

_"N-Ninian! Yeah, I am. Here, take a seat."_

_It may have been a river but it did have strangely well-placed seating spots._

_Ninian smiled sweetly. "Nils found a whole tree laden with apples! I, um, I brought you one, Miss Florina."_

_Florina accepted the offering. "Aw, Ninian, thanks!" It was the rosiest red, and she opened up to take a bite, only to recoil as the apple made the lip she'd forgotten was split sting hard. She tried to grin at Ninian, and say a quick trip to Serra would remedy this and they could get back to talking in no time -_

_She felt Ninian's arms snake up around her own, and stray strands of her hair brushed across her face – Florina's senses had never gone into overdrive before, but oh boy, in that moment, she was_ alive. _Before she knew it, Ninian's breath had fanned across her lip, a thin layer of... frost... in its place?_

_Her lips were cold as ice while her face was the polar opposite. But the bleeding had stemmed, and Ninian was red as well, and oh heavens WHO gave her the right to look this adorable-_

* * *

 

"Alright, alright, I get it! She was pretty! Move on!"

Florina pouted. "You don't get it! She was _unearthly_ in that moment!"

"Yes, yes, and what happened after?"

"Oh. Nothing really. I... I wasn't brave enough to ask, and we just shared the apple."

Fiora glared at her.

"Heavens above... you're the worst storyteller I've ever seen, Florina..."

"Am not! I can tell stories just fine! Tate likes them!"

"Tate can't even understand _me_ yet-"

"She can! Watch me, I'll tell you about this time I..."

* * *

 

_"Miss Florina... what... is this?"_

_Florina grinned at her, taking a seat beside her on Ninian's bed._

_"It's a common beverage in Ilia," she said, holding Ninian's cup out to her. "It's called hot chocolate. I thought it might do you good."_

_Ninian took the offered cup. It warmed her hands, and it smelt most delicious. She hadn't had the stomach for dinner, but this looked like it would fare better..._

_She took a sip. Warmth flooded her body in a most pleasing way. It wasn't hot enough to scald, and not sweet to the point of being nauseating. It was actually... quite pleasant._

_"You like it?" Florina questioned, sipping from her own cup, smiling at her._

_"...Yes." Ninian replied. Somehow, there was a warmth in this that was not too different from how she felt when in Nils' presence._

_"Thank heavens... I was nervous, even though I've been drinking this since my childhood." she shook her head, as if shaking off the nervousness. "Did you know I was really scared of hailstorms when I was little? Farina would always make this for me and tell me bedtime stories, even if it wasn't bedtime yet."_

_Ninian cocked her head to the side. "What is... a bedtime story?"_

_Florina stared at her, and for a moment Ninian was afraid she was going to laugh._

_"It's, um, it's a story you read out to children to make them fall asleep."_

_"But Dame Serra's staff can do that..."_

_"No, no! You can't use staves on children, Ninian! It's bad for their health!"_

_"I see... Miss Florina, would you mind telling me a bedtime story?" Ninian pondered. She was curious as to what it would be like to experience this... strange incantation herself._

_"Huh? Sure... I remember plenty of them. But you have to get into bed first!"_

_"I see... very well." Ninian finished the last of her hot chocolate, placing the cup on the table before moving to get under her sheets._

_Florina left her seat to dim the lights. Today was their last night at an inn, for who knew how long... it would be nice to make this night one to remember._

_"This is the story of a pegasus knight, with hair as brilliantly green as the first leaves of spring, and her wife, a famous dancer whose name went on to become famous through the land..."_

* * *

 

"My goodness. You told her _bedtime stories?_ Really, Florina?"

The falconknight nudged her sister's side. "Hey, it was cute. And there was also that time I took her for a ride on my pegasus!"

"Oh, this I want to see! Did she fall off?"

Florina pursed her lips indignantly. "Fiora!"

Fiora laughed, to Tate's delight. "Well, tell me!"

Florina blushed, looking this way and that. "Well, I... I don't know about..."

Fiora's mouth took the shape of a perfect 'o.' "You kissed her? On your _pegasus!!!_ Florina!"

"No! I ended up in the healer's tent!"

* * *

 

_It was a new moon tonight – one of the worst kinds of nights for flying. Florina sighed, walking to where Huey had been waiting for a chance to stretch his legs. He'd have to go without._

_"Miss Florina? May I... may I ask for a ride on your pegasus?"_

_The voice startled Florina, almost to the point of dropping the apple in her hands._

_"Ninian?"_

_"Is it... not possible?"_

_"H-huh? No, I mean..." Florina debated her options. It was pitch dark... but that just meant no one else would be flying. If Ninian really wanted to go..._

_"I've ridden on a horse before," Ninian explained, "but never a pegasus. I thought I'd like to try before... before tomorrow."_

_Tomorrow. Their departure to the Dread Isle. Florina wanted to yell at her, tell her not to speak as if she'd seen a premonition of... of something bad._

_"...Alright. You're probably going to get sick of the height, though, I'm worried..."_

_"Oh, you need not worry about that," Ninian beamed, drawing her shawl more snugly around her shoulders. "I am quite comfortable with heights."_

_Florina laughed. She really ought to have guessed by now. She picked up Huey's saddle, stroked him all over and grinned as he happily whinnied. She hoisted Ninian up first, following soon after. There was something to be said about how naturally Ninian's arms slipped around Florina's waist, and stayed there._

_With a simple command, up they went!_

_"Miss Florina, the clouds, they... they are dissolving!"_

_It wasn't all too different from how Florina remembered her younger self being. She beamed back in response._

_"Yeah! It's like fog, or snow, really! Like... the clouds are sugar in the tea of the air!"_

_Ninian giggled. Florina felt a little less mortified for the horrible joke._

_"Hey, Ninian, hold on tight!"_

_Ninian obliged. Her body heat seeped through her clothes and mingled with Florina's as she directed Huey to fly in a sharp 'O,' causing her companion to cling to her even more tightly._

* * *

 

"Aren't you the smoothest little sister," Fiora squealed, pretending to fan herself. "What happened after that?"

Florina scratched the back of her head, looking away at more snow-topped mountains.

"I... I had to go visit Serra because, um, I forgot she was a dragon and stuff... well, it wasn't pretty. Or painless. But it was totally worth it." She made a thumbs-up sign with her right hand.

" _What?_ Florina. What?"

"It wasn't her fault she was scared! She just... um, held on a little too tight. There wasn't even that much blood-"

"There was _blood?"_

Florina sighed and slapped her hand over her mouth. There was no way she was making things better by talking.

Fiora shifted Tate in her arms. "I feel like everything I knew about her was a lie now."

The younger sister shrugged. "Maybe it was. It's... too late to start over, anyways."

* * *

 

_Florina had swallowed plenty of bitter pills in her lifetime. She'd been through a lot, and gotten up each time._

_But this..._

_"Dame... Florina... I-"_

_"Ninian!" Unseemly trails of tears were running down Florina's face, and they weren't going to stop anytime soon. Not with... "Don't talk! Wait, Priscilla's coming here right now-"_

_But Ninian only shook her head, a bittersweet smile playing on her lips._

_"Once cut... by the holy blade... no dragon can..."_

_"Don't say that! Ninian! You can't die!"_

_Florina tightened her grasp on Ninian's hand, her head cradled on her lap as it was. Perhaps she felt that by not letting go, she could anchor her to this world._

_"We – we're going back to Ilia together, aren't we! You can't!"_

_"Miss... Florina, I... thank you... for all our time... together, I..."_

_"Ninian! NINIAN!"_

_The dragon's lifeless body slid from Florina's lap to the ground; still Nergal's eery laughter echoed in her ears, and maybe for the first time in her life, she was on fire. Glassy eyes stared back at her, still wet with tears. With a shaking hand she closed them._

_She screamed._

* * *

 

Fiora looked uncomfortable. Understandable, considering the sensitive topic.

"Well, go on. There's more, right?" she waved a hand, trying to draw the attention from her wet eyes.

"...Yeah," Florina agreed. "I... I was so angry at Lord Eliwood, I... I was ready to run my lance through him. He was so enamoured with her, treated her like some doll, and yet when it came down to it he couldn't do a thing to save her. But neither did I.

"Looking back, there are a lot of things I wish I'd done differently. Like Nils... I wish I'd reached out to Nils. I know he was just as, if not more, broken over her death as I was. I could see him spend entire nights outside from Huey's back. And yet, I was so blinded by my own emotions I couldn't see a thing. I regret that so much.

"I specifically asked Mark to let me be there when we faced Nergal. They... they agreed. My resolve was strong – I was going to either take his life or give up mine trying. But then," Florina's voice broke, "she came back."

_Trying to think felt like flying through heavy clouds. Florina could hear the sound of each drop of blood dripping to the floor, each bead of sweat trickling down her back._

_And then Ninian... sweet, tired Ninian took down two whole dragons, and ended up falling to the ground once more. It was like some horrible, endlessly looping dream. If Bramimond hadn't been apparating in and out her lance would have been intimate with his ribcage in an instant, but Nils..._

_"It's okay! She's just fainted. She's alive!"_

_She forced air through her lungs, trying to push out her thoughts out of her head. All she had to do now was finish this, and then she would be free to take Ninian where ever she pleased._

* * *

 

"I still can't believe I was expecting a happy ending, just like that," Florina broke her narration to say. "Youth is truly blinding."

"You're still young," Fiora rolled her eyes. "Enough theatrics."

Florina looked away, peeved.

* * *

 

_After the hordes of armies they'd been through, taking on Nergal by himself was a little anticlimactic, to be honest. Florina poured everything she had into this one last fight. It was she who pierced straight through his heart, and she couldn't be happier for it._

* * *

 

"Bloodthirsty much?" Fiora remarked, grimacing.

Florina swatted her arm, but didn't deny the accusation.

"I can't say it mattered much in the end, though."

"Oh?" Fiora looked at her.

"She had to return to her world, along with Nils. She said goodbye, just as if she was going to the market, and left. Somewhere, she's supporting an entire world right now." Florina gazed wistfully at the sky.

Fiora jammed her elbow in her sister's side. "Is goodbye _all_ she said...?"

Florina did the same. "Uh. Well."

* * *

 

_"Miss Florina, I must leave," Ninian approached her, the Dragon's Gate looming ominously before them. "But I know I have caused you grief, just as you have given me immense joy."_

_Florina bit her lip. Their victory hadn't even fully sunk in yet, and Ninian..._

_"For that I would like to apologize... Miss Florina, thank you for everything. I... I enjoyed the rides on your pegasus, and the chocolates, and the stories, and... everything about you, Miss Florina. Thank you very much. Please know that even if I must leave, I... I will keep you in my heart forever."_

_Florina smiled, letting a stray tear fall. "Ninian, I should thank you. You went along with my silly ideas, and you've been my strength this entire time. We... we may not be able to go to Ilia together like we promised but... I will always be thinking of you, as well... Goodbye."_

_Ninian opened her mouth to reply, only to be cut off by Nils' shout to make haste. She waved him off with a smile._

_"...Goodbye, Miss Florina."_

_Ninian turned to leave, but spun back around as if she'd forgotten something, marching up to Florina and planting a kiss square on her cheek._

_"Farewell, Miss Florina!"_

_And she marched off without a look back, her cheeks red and wet._

* * *

 

"Listen, you have to stop doing this to me," Fiora whined, drying her eyes with Florina's scarf. "Every year you tell me this and make me cry!"

"I don't _ask_ you to cry, do I?!"

"It's just so sad, okay!? She's probably missing you, and you're pining after her, and... ugh! You guys never even had a proper kiss!"

"Wh- That's none of your business! I-"

**Author's Note:**

> *incoherent groans from garbage can*


End file.
